The Ministry of Unfulfillment
Thoughts on unanswered prayers, disappointments, and the hard-scrabble for hope
The other day while reading Howard Thurman’s Meditations Of The Heart, I came across a passage that rattled my teeth for the ways it feels both true and difficult.
In Thurman’s meditation, The Patience of Unanswered Prayer, he reflects on the ways we are tempted to search for something within our own lives to meet an inner hunger and longing we carry, when it seems God is slow in His coming. Or, when we perhaps believe that God is not coming to us at all. Our searching for the “key to unlock the door of the treasure house” more often that not leads to our bumping up against our own limitations. We cannot force God’s hand. We are not capable of imagining our longings into existence. Prayer is not a name-it-and-claim it kind of exchange.
Sometimes, God says “no”.
Thurman reflected that after the searching is exhausted, (or perhaps it is interrupted) the revelation may dawn in us that prayers that seem unfulfilled may be in fact working a different Truth into our hearts. He invites us to imagine that it is precisely IN the unfulfillment and unmet longing that God meets us.
Slowly it may dawn upon the spirit that there is a special ministry of unfulfillment. It may be that persistent hunger is an Angel of Light, carrying out a particular assignment in life. With the coming of this possibility into consideration, slowly tensions relaxed and the center of emphasis is shifted from the hunger itself to what it has meant to deal with it through the years. Slowly at first the words are shaped and the pattern of them shows itself. At last, a man may say, “I know now that there is present in my life a quality that is only mine because the hunger is mine. Thus at last, I come to the door and seek entrance where is gathered the great community. I know the password: Teach me the patience of unanswered prayer.”
This season are being marked by loss. We are each of us, receiving a daily invitation to surrender yet another plan, dream, hope, expectation, need, desire, and longing to God. Our losses run the gamut, and each one of them counts. None are irrelevant. God knows it.
And still, in the midst of what feels unfulfilled, God is right here. Immanuel—God with us.
God is our refuge and strength, a helper who is always found in times of trouble. (Psalm 46:1, CSB, emphasis mine.)
A few links to encourage you
The Art of Surrender- An interview with Vivid Artistry founder, Libby John
Better Stories- A conversation about better stories with my friend from way back in college, Justin Bowers.
“Noticing how we feel isn’t only about taking stock of the external, but the internal as well. Does our heart race? Is our stomach tense with anxiety? Do our shoulders feel tight? Are our feet sore from too much standing? These are touch points, putting us in touch with our needs and places where we can invite God to minister to us in our great need.” —An excerpt from Sense Enough, my piece in the summer issue of Cultivating
Cultivating The Garden Of The Lord— Abby King for Cultivating
How To Pray When You’re Sad— Emily P. Freeman (I particularly appreciate this episode, as it reminded me of the chapter in my book, Everything Is Yours, called, Prescribed Burns.)
The Refinery, An Artists Guild for women— for a short time, I am opening up membership into The Refinery. We are not even a month in, and already this is my favorite online community. Think: encouragement, grace-filled sharing, and inspiration.
As always, thanks for reading. I’m grateful for you! Want to share your thoughts? Feel free to hit “reply” on this email. I always love to hear from you.
In Hope,
Kris